Accepting That It Can Get Better

By: Sammy Bellisario

This year has been quite the experience for most of us. Whether you’ve experienced physical loss, the loss of your freedom, who you once were or a relationship that was important to you, your feelings are valid. I’ve noticed that throughout this past year, it has almost seemed like there has been a competition of “who has it worst.” Yes, some people have experienced more hardships during the pandemic, but that doesn’t make someone else's personal experience any less meaningful. My challenge for you this week is to try to start letting go of any anger, sadness, or hurt that you’ve endured in the past year. It has been a hard winter, a hard summer, and even a hard spring. This isn’t easy, but actively choosing to heal is one of the hardest steps in the process of letting go. 

As humans, many of us harbor negative feelings towards painful memories and anyone or anything that has caused us to hurt. Even if you aren’t actively aware of it, this pain can weigh on you over time and hold you back from personal growth. This past year I have harbored many negative feelings that still haunt me. 2020 started off as a positive for me. I was about to graduate from college, start my career, move to the city, and travel as much as possible. My negative feelings started with the anger that Covid took my senior year away from me and halted all of these plans. Then things got even more real when I experienced a Covid death in my family. This made me even angrier that this virus was not only taking away plans that I was making but also important people in my life. Along with this, I’ve had relationship struggles and everything else in between. While I might not have had the worst hardships of anyone reading this, these hardships were very difficult for me and have left somewhat of a negative cloud over my head to this day. 

Now that it is a few months into 2021 and I’m starting to see a bit of the light at the end of the tunnel, I’m learning to accept all that we’ve been through this year as a part of the journey. I know that sounds cliche but this isn’t going to be the last time we experience a negative point in our lives. It’s important to be able to pick yourself up and start to let go of anything that has caused you pain. 

One of the ways I’ve learned to heal is by accepting the things that I can’t change and by trying to identify any positives that may have come from that situation. For example, losing out on my senior year of college and having to move home allowed me to spend a lot of extra time with my family that I wouldn’t have had if I stayed at school. I also like to identify any positive changes I’ve made in myself throughout these difficult times or any lessons I’ve learned. I try to turn any situation into something positive to help my healing process. 

I also like to move on by looking forward and recognizing good things in my life. Having positive plans to look forward to helps me to move away from the negative. 

While it is important not to dwell on the past, it’s also important not to suppress any negative feelings you’re having. Be as open as you can and release those feelings and emotions by sharing your thoughts.

Things are starting to look up. Vaccines are becoming available, the world is slowly opening up and there are so many great things to look forward to. We still have 9 amazing months to make this year amazing! Any setbacks along the way are just a part of the journey that is life.