Navigating the Holidays: How to deal with loneliness, social anxiety and family issues
By: Sammy Bellisario
Lifestyle Columnist for The Stories We Need to Hear Magazine
The holidays are rapidly approaching which can be a huge source of anxiety for many people. This year is going to be a bit different than those in the past with all of the new regulations put in place due to the virus. All of this uncertainty can breed added anxiety and depression to anyone struggling. We hear you and completely understand your concerns. That being said there are many routes that can be taken in these situations, in finding ways to cope with these new changes.
Social anxiety can be a huge obstacle when it comes to the holidays. If you plan on gathering with friends or family this year it can trigger your anxiety being in groups. I’m all too familiar with this phobia. The physical symptoms are always so apparent; nausea, lightheadedness, zoning out and much more. One of my best coping tools in these situations is to have someone that is aware of mental health and there to offer support if needed. This individual can provide an out if I’m feeling too overwhelmed. If the thought of being in a group for the holidays is too overwhelming, remember that you can always use social distancing as an excuse to stay home. You do not need to feel pressured if you aren’t ready for that kind of interaction. Social distancing is an easy and understandable excuse for someone who doesn’t want to explain their social anxiety.
Another stressful situation many people experience during the holidays is issues with their families. As adults it’s important to set your boundaries when it comes to family and friends. Even though someone may be blood related to you it doesn’t mean you have to subject yourself to an unhealthy environment during the holidays. If you do choose to see your family this year, go into the situation open-minded while also staying true to your values. Avoid any hard conversations that might breed conflict. If possible, stick with a family member you feel closest to or bring a friend/boyfriend to make you feel more comfortable in a potentially stressful environment. A healthy support system can provide a different perspective to the situation and help to calm you down if necessary.
The last thing I’d like to address is the feeling of loneliness during the holidays. This is especially relevant this year with the need to isolate to avoid spreading the virus. The first thing to remember is why you are isolating and the importance behind it. By isolating you are protecting your loved ones and ensuring that no one will be missing when you meet again post-pandemic. Staying busy is a great way to avoid feeling lonely. Make yourself a great meal, go for a walk or plan a video call with friends and family which are all great ways to fill your holidays. I know that lots of people are battling with the reality of living alone or not being able to travel to see their loved ones during the holidays. It is important to remember that these unfortunate circumstances won’t last forever. Things are looking up in the world and hopefully one day very soon we will be able to spend time with family and friends, hug our loved ones, and return to a somewhat normal life again. Until then, utilizing technology and doing little things to keep us busy are the most healthy ways to cope with the feeling of loneliness. If possible, making plans with a small group of friends can also be a great option to combat loneliness this time of year.
No matter what you decide to do this holiday season, it is important to remember that so many people are dealing with the same anxieties this time of the year. Keeping an open line of communication with those who are experiencing the same realities as you can help you feel validated. This open communication can also help you think clearly about what you actually need, in order to keep your mental health stable during these tough times. Don’t let anyone pressure you into interactions that you aren’t ready for and that may trigger your anxiety or depression. Lastly, remember that you are strong and have been through so hard situations in the past. You can continue to work through them in the future.
