Managing the Mental Toll of the Job Search
By: Jessica Mardian
Mental Health Writer
Laying in bed, mind spiraling into questions with answers that can’t be changed, creates uncertainty like a weighted blanket keeping the body down. Slowly moving from my bed to a laptop screen filled with vacant positions and a resume that at one point seemed to be brimming with more than enough qualifications, now just looks sad and small. This is the post-grad job search; a slow and anxiety-riddled mental and emotionally draining process. I know it. I feel it.
That final semester of college doesn’t totally feel real until graduation day comes and goes; then, you're handed a diploma and left standing at the edge of a pool. You want to jump in and join this fabled “real world” full of salaries, moves to new cities, exciting experiences, opportunities, and rewards for the debt and work put into college. You’re ready for it, but your legs can’t leave the pavement. You’re stuck watching and waiting as classmates dive into careers or master degrees, some having even graduated with job offers. You’re glued to the sidelines until you get that email or phone call confirming that you have a job. The job search period is full of so much anxiety and uncertainty, it can be all-consuming. Keeping your mental health in-check and prioritized during this time is difficult.
Don’t feel guilty for resting and not having a job right out of the gate. Family members, friends, peers, and today’s culture amplify the pressure always to be moving and succeeding, especially in your twenties. While some of this stress may have well-intention, it doesn’t make any job searching aspect easier. You just finished four years of hard work, be proud of yourself. Check-in on yourself and where your mind is before rushing into a career. This state of limbo between college and career doesn’t have to be go, go, go. Grieve the end of a chapter, say goodbye to friends and organizations, and be happy that you never have to worry about filling required credits, campus parking, and meal plans again.
Give this time more purpose by pouring energy into your passions. What was always pushed aside because of assignments can now be started again. Face whatever task you’ve been avoiding: cleaning out your closet, starting therapy, reading that stack of books, or trying a new workout. Explore what brings you joy. I like to do DIYs and read, so in this lull I’ve been starting new projects and tackling a reading list.
Sometimes I think I’m wasting my time doing these activities that bring me joy. Instead, I could be spending more hours looking for jobs. I internalize the pressures and question if the degree I got was worth it or if the college I attended was the right choice. Thus the spiral continues. To combat this, I try to remind myself that the right job will come when it’s supposed to. If you are giving your job search the attention and time it demands, opportunities will come. Having passions and relaxing won’t subtract from that and without grounding ourselves in what we love, we are more susceptible to the job search's anxiety. Also, getting a job is a victory but it’s not supposed to be everything or completely fill your cup. Take this downtime to give back to you.
Searching for a job is a job of its own, with a unique set of pressures. It requires time and focus. It’s draining, and not having structure to your job search process will only take more of a toll on you. Create spaces of rest and set boundaries for yourself. Don’t be afraid to keep LinkedIn and Indeed notifications minimal, if at all. Constant emails with open positions create a whirlwind of pressure always to be applying, and for the sake of your mental health, you can’t be glued to your computer or phone. Allot a set of hours in the day to look for jobs and establish a routine and don’t stray from it. Giving myself a schedule and goals has also been reassuring because I know that I’m giving this my all.
I tend to work on something best when I have a deadline approaching fast, am feeling inspired, or it’s mid-afternoon. Knowing this, I structure my days to do the most work later in the day and set my deadlines for submitting applications. This became significantly easier when I found my job search rhythm by having a standard cover letter that I could individualize for each company. I touched up my resume and discovered the search terms that gave me positions that closely aligned with my field.
Take your job search with a shot of perspective. I try to navigate my job search with goals and a rough vision of what I want, not with blinders preventing me from seeing something that could very well change or be the complete opposite of what I expected. Job searching right after college can be murky, because we don’t totally know what is out there since we haven’t even gotten out yet. Chasing the idea of a “dream job” can add an extra layer of anxiety to job searching. We tend to build things up in our heads and just charge after them. Keep ambition and goals, but don’t close yourself off to positions that may not have been in your original plan. Staying open to all possibilities has been one of the most effective ways I’ve been able to manage job search anxiety.
The entire job searching process is built on uncertainty and putting yourself out there, waiting for something to come through. It’s hard. As I was voicing my fears of not getting a job to my dad, he told me that it’ll be great to be wanted by a company, but that it’s also my career and I don’t have to accept the first opportunity that comes my way just because it’s in front of me. When you aren’t hearing back from companies and seem to be stalled in your job search, it’s understandable to have doubt and just want whatever is set in front of you. Maybe that first offer is what you wish, or perhaps it’s not. If your situation provides for it, it’s okay to wait a bit and keep searching. Your job searching process is yours and yours alone.
Hang in there. I know it’s cheesy, but it’s true. Continue giving the energy to filling in applications and going through interviews, and opportunities will come. Keep your mental health by sticking to boundaries and taking time to relax and do your hobbies. Never feel guilty for resting. It takes a lot of work to get to where you want to go. Soon enough, you’ll be jumping into the “real world” pool with the job that’s meant for you.
